Guns and Roses -
Reviewed by Joey
1 out of 5 Faces (Ratings)
Release Date: November 23, 2008
Label:
Let me begin this review by saying that Guns N’ Roses is one of the bands can distinctly remember the first time I heard. It was amazing. It didn’t sound like anything I had ever heard before. In the year 2008 we were finally graced with Chinese Democracy. Now if you don’t know the history behind this album I kind of wonder what you are doing wasting your time on this site as most of the things we talk about must seem crazy to you. But in the spirit of being fair let me run a little synopsis. Chinese Democracy is the sixth studio album by GNR and took over ten years of tinkering by crazy Axl Rose and I think ten dump trucks full of gold doubloons to be completed. For a long time people that the only thing that would ever here this album were unicorns since they were both mythical. Ok are we all caught up? Good.
Now, on to the reviewing. This album is awful. It is also not a GNR album. From now until my time on earth is done we shall call this Axl Rose’s Crappy Solo Album or ARCSA for short. Everything about ARCSA makes my teeth sweat. I think that problem is that the album attempts to move into the present day hard rock music scene without allowing us to grow with the band musically over the last ten years. If we had gotten two or three more albums from GNR over this time frame building to ARCSA it might be more palatable but in its present form it is awful. I lovingly placed this CD in to the CD player in my car with great anticipation. There was a fleeting second before the speakers began to defecate all over my ears that I actually thought that there was a chance that it would be great. After scanning through the first few songs looking for something decent I got angry with myself for allowing myself to actually believe that it was going to be good.
I thought about offering a song by song break down of this album like Adam and Garrett so masterfully provide you our faithful readers but at this point I am not smart enough to write that much without needing a nap and to be honest this album doesn’t deserve that much attention. I read Spin Magazines Top 40 albums and they actually included this in the top 40 and it made me look to see if the Onion had taken over for the year or if we were all getting Punked. Nope just some blithering idiot writing crap. Wait that sounds like this article. Nevermind. Please if I can do you one favor. Do not subject yourself to ARCSA. I don’t think there are words to express my disgust for this album so this is what you get.